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Forgotten

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It seems like a distant yesterday No, more like a dream chipping away Pale or blur, I can’t even say Back and forth, my memories sway  The smiles of us young The whistles of winds sung As we sailed through time  Our hearts filled with joy though without a dime The feel of your warmth Over the horizon, your smile kept me charmed Life in its simplest form Yet heaven to me, my heart was calm  How could I forget The rhythm of your heart touching mine  The home I saw in you The pure fragrance of love, now I’m full of regret How did my mind fray? What was the genesis? Was it the unsaid hello? The little white lie? How did I miss this? Oh, my brain is made of hay You were my treasure, my goddess I dined with swine, forgave regardless But your heart could only take so much I wish I remembered sooner; I wish I could see that smile once more #JayOach  #Pharmpoet

Black hole

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Why does it hurt so much? Why does every waking moment feel like an endless torture  The deafening screams of my heart is silent to all  None hears me, none connects with me, none feels me    I try to hold a smile but it’s a mirage, blanketing my sorrow  I try to hold myself, but I’m hollow  I see laughter all around me, but none with me  Eyes stare but only through me    They say there is light at the end of a tunnel  This is no tunnel I am falling, I keep falling, deep into the abyss I keep falling  Into a black hole    I feel the weight of every tic, every toc  My eyes are dried out, every tear drop burns  My hopes dashed, my dreams, a waking nightmare  The canvas of my life is blackened out   My hands are stretched out Screaming for someone to reach out, anyone?  Praying to the endless, crying to be pulled from this quicksand  But my prayers are unheard and I’m hanging by a thread       MannyUchiha

Letting go, hanging on

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My hands are bleeding; bruised beyond repair, yet my grip tightens My tears run; painfully drowning, yet I keep breathing My eyes are sorrowful; red shot with burning pain, yet open to the full glare My voice hoarse, dried throat beyond thirst, yet I’m yelling My heart is heavy; pounds in my chest, resounding in my soul Whispering voices hover; singing deep into me Trying to sway my resolve, all promising the impossible Who do I listen to? The voices, My heart? Do they even differ? Holding on is killing me and letting go could be suicidal I’m hanging on the edge, letting go will see me lose it all I’m so close to the goal, I can feel it. Or am I? Can I hang long enough? Is it worth it? Should I hang on? Should I let go? A simple question, Yay or Nay The path I take, determines the destination Will I fall into oblivion, rest my hopes on faith or hang in this hell? Is it a question of logic, bravery or stupidity? I have worked so hard to get here, smoked the bitter

Remember

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The leaves wilt Soon the season will tilt The world will cease to a halt A new beginning glim in sight The past shakes In the distance, yesterday fades Slowing dying in noon’s shade Disappearing into the distance cascade We match forward Ne're turning around, only onward But my minds eye doesn't fail I recall every detail From hello to adios Through hug to lies From kiss to kicks Warm hands to cold pecks We watched the sun set on the horizon Too bad I allowed it to set on our belonging Without an anchor we drifted into comparison And lost all sense of loving I'm not asking for a third chance Neither am I asking for another dance True I dreaming of an awakening glace But I only ask, you remember the opening fence

Purity

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How can I live pure, walk in His tight shoes? Follow His prints; aline my steps with His? My mind is constantly searching, seeking Wanting purification, dreaming holiness The road is webbed, the destinations undefined The options infinite, the whispers crowding What do I do? Who do I listen to? Oh! my head is exploding; sinking in thoughts I'm in my prime, my strengths are apexing I want the most from my timed existence I don't want to wail tomorrow, cursing the choices of today I want a happy tomorrow, but one question remains, HOW? I have tried, on my own I have fought But I'm losing my resolve, my will withers The temptations are strongly gaining Oh! the sweetness of the worldly pleasures But I dream of white lenin, without a mole of dent A book with glass leaves, a vessel without flaws I want my steps to glitter; my words scriptured An angel amidst; a walking perfection But the question remains, HOW? How do I resist the devil; his tempting promise?

Thank you Mum, I Iove you

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She says I was gifted from heaven An answer to a prayer; a blessing from the most high That drew a smile, got her singing like she was high Made her dance from dawn till dawn But she couldn’t be more wrong   For I am the one who struck a pot of gold To have you gifted to me, born to you To experience the essence of your immortalised love From where do I begin, which memory do I recall first? Which hug do I ping as the warmest? The motivation, the support, the love, OMG the food I couldn’t list all even if I had an ocean of ink I remember the sacrifices you made for me Ensuring I never went to bed hungry Stayed by my side when I was unwell, pampered me like a prince And kissed me good night when I drifted into dreams I’m sorry for the hell I rained on you   I thought you were nag bug, a leech to my peace, scolded me because you could I didn’t get it then; wish I did but now I do and I'm glad you did I know you forgave, you forgot but I haven’t, I’m sorry

Zooooooooooooned!!!!

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I have always been there From genesis, I have been the shoulder The silent donkey that never tires, never brays  Yet never appreciated, never looked at I have watched, believe me, I have lived your every moment Every sorry excuse, every ridiculous lie told I have watched as they danced in and stormed out Flirting with your emotions, shutting your smile Always been your shoulder, the only shoulder The living wipe to your never drying tears My handkerchiefs, soaked, my throat, dried from consoling you I'm always there to say, "don't worry dearie, you will be fine" I have loved you in secret, dreamed of you with my eyes open Longed to make you feel like a woman and not a sex doll Wishing I could light up that drooping face Make nature jealous of my dreamed happiness But my feelings don't really matter, do they? I'm always going to be that friend who holds your hair while you puke Make your soup in the morning  after your hangover And dresses yo